I’m halfway through the HBO doc on Heaven’s Gate and it is devastating in the context of qanon. People laughed when they died. There was no respect for the families who lost them long ago.

I think now, post—Trump, people better understand the way comedy, clownishness, and absurdity cover up tragedy and evil

productivity musings probably obvious to most 

productivity musings probably obvious to most, but today’s revelation for me:

Some work takes a few seconds like opening an envelope with expected stressful contents.

Other things might take hours but are pleasurable or somewhat pleasurable hours.

today I logged the time/stress equivalent of opening several stressful envelopes and I have plenty of *time* left in this day but not a surplus of energy to do much more


I got my mom Yossy Arefi's Snacking Cakes book for christmas and we made the vegan chocolate cake to celebrate today. Tastes like a normal (super tasty) cake even with gluten free flour. 🎂

i am much more emotional tonight about what's happening tomorrow than i thought i would be (and i already knew it would be intense)

the actual good, get lost in it, entertaining tv? 

i have now moved on to Lodge 49 and i really really love it. laid back and strange without trying too hard.

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vitamin d! 

bloodwork came back and it turns out my nearly month-long spell of tiredness is likely because i have serious vitamin d deficiency.

this feels like good news since a) supplements are easy b) i thought it was iron, which would be bad since i'm already on supplements and eating weird food like canned oysters and pumpkin seeds to keep that up and c) i've had many similar spells of fatigue/brain fog when my blood tests were normal and I hate getting asked "sure you aren't depressed??"


also, i'm scared each of the rioters is capable of Tim McVeigh shit. My friend recommended Leah Sottile's podcasts because that moment in history is terrifyingly relevant to what's happening now

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this feels like the attack in charlottesville times a million and what happened in charlottesville was already a low that left me depressed for weeks

the actual good, get lost in it, entertaining tv? 

update: i have arrived at Party Down and I think I'm going to stick to this one.

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writing about movies 

one of the funniest things about writing a column about movies is that regularly i'll have something on my to do list like "watch World War Z" and not really want to do it. lmao

the actual good, get lost in it, entertaining tv? 

and the last time I had a bad anemia/fatigue/etc moment I got way into The Walking Dead which is so good at being dumb.

I just put on Breaking Bad but not sure I'm feeling it and wonder if I should switch to Battlestar or something else...

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the actual good, get lost in it, entertaining tv? 

what are the best entertaining/ dramatic/twisty tv shows that you can get lost in over multiple seasons? I watched a lot of tv in the 90s & recently with netflix streaming stuff but missed most *prestige tv* stuff.

the reason i ask is i'm dealing w/ anemia/fatigue issues and probably will be resting a lot this week. the last show I really liked was The Plot Against America (a surprise! it didn't feel so heavy handed now the election is over)

i made a to do list for NYE because i was convinced last week that if I didn't work on TOP SECRET PROJECT at the *stroke of midnight* i'd turn into a pumpkin or just never actually finish it. but you know what? i'm tired!! i need rest! i'm not doing anything tonight!! (except eating, hangin out online, watching tv etc...just not work even secret personal projects work)

interesting abandoned online spaces? 

it's been so long that i nearly forgot i did a project like this ten years ago lol

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interesting abandoned online spaces? 

has anyone come across any interesting examples of dormant message boards or chat rooms? things like angelfire guestbooks and such also work.
i'm working on a new project that will be a tour of various online ruins and trying to come up with an interesting range (Second Life, Usenet, Sissyfight :blobcat_mlem:, and few others...) would love any suggestions!!


i was reminded this weekend what my ultimate goal had been for 2020: to move back to the west coast, find a nice and stable ux copywriter job, and get back on my feet FINALLY. Now .... I guess this might 2022?

A serious post about the movie HACKERS (1995) 

it's on HBO rn and I watched it for the first time in ages last night. This time I was blown away by ....Jonny Lee Miller's performance!? it really seems he spent time with the 2600/HOPE crowd and took tons of notes. I dont think I've seen a more authentic portrayal of a, um, hacker in a movie

today's accomplishment 

i finished 2/3rds of an essay due today before requesting more time (also assuming the deadline on a sunday had been an error so this wont be a problem for them.) Now I'm watching X Files for the rest of the day/night on the couch.

It had never occurred to me before to use *requesting an extension* as a reward but i feel a whole lot less anxious now than if i had written absolutely nothing before asking for more time.

more successful distractions 

the trader joes vegan queso is the best trader joes weird food i can think of fyi

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